This post originally appeared onThe Muse.
I Was Surprised/Confused/Curious About…
What the Person Hears: Youre Wrong.
I worked with a woman who often tried disguise her criticism in this way.
While she mightve done this in an attempt to soften the blow, I never heard it like that.
Which was unfortunate, because Im pretty sure she often had a point.
What to Say Instead
I thought X was different, because Y.
Can you walk me through your steps?
Ive run into this a few times when working with larger, cross-functional teams.
Inevitably, there would be a few different translations of a projects goals.
And if everyone wasnt communicating well, wires would get crossed and the project would get off track.
Actually….
What the Person Hears: I Think Youre an Idiot.
In this case, you canactuallyjust remove the actually from whatever youre about to say.
Beingor appearingpassive aggressive can really sneak up on you.
When we make a run at minimize criticism, things can easily go awry.
Rather than couching your constructive criticism in confusing language, just come out and say itpolitely.
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Images byMeilunandjesadaphorn(Shutterstock).
