The Different Ways People Handle Criticism (and How to Do It Better)

Nobody likes being told that they suck, but that’s how most of usfeelwhen we receive criticism.

However, not all of us deal with criticism the same way.

Some people instantly know it’s not personal, and some people are defensive.

Here’s how different people handle it and what you’re free to do yourself when receiving critiques.

This post originally appeared on theCrew blog.

Your Brain on Criticism

According toDr.

And these events stick with us.

This kind of response to criticism is characterized by mentally putting yourself down and being overly hard on yourself.

Much like the internalizer, the self-convincer is one whotakes negative feedback very personally.

However, rather than internally blaming yourself, you deflect the blame back onto others, possibly even verbally.

It’s natural for us to defend ourselves against outside threats, including criticism.

Defenders exhibit a mild, albeit somewhat defensive, reaction to negative feedback.

You likely think that your critic is somewhat misguided and are fine to leave it at that.

Handling criticism in this way means that you actively ask questions about the critique.

More or less, this is probably how you should aspire to handle most criticism.

Dr. Paulus says that it’s important for us to separate criticism from our sense of self.

Asking open-ended questions is the best way for you to learn this information.

Simple ‘yes’ and ‘no’ questions show that you’re listening but not actively seeking new feedback.

Ask questions like, ‘How would you like me to handle this situation next time?’

or ‘Could you describe an example of how you’d like me to handle this in the future?’

Don’t View Mistakes as Entirely Bad

I know it sounds crazy, but mistakes aren’t actually bad.

You just can’t let the negatives get you down.

Image bykasahasa(Shutterstock),Peter Alfred Hess,Kristian Bjornard(Flickr).

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