Winning isnt everything, but it sure is nice.
When you dont see eye to eye with someone, here are the best tricks for winning that argument.
Speak confidently, be concise, and try not to repeat yourself.
Having facts that can support your stance is helpful, sure, but being convincing matters more.
Just stating facts can also seem defensive if it isnt done right.
Use facts if you have them, but keep the confidence cranked up to the max.
A battle of attrition, as opposed to all out combat.
Confirmation Bias:Ignoring certain facts because of personally held beliefs.
For example, you cant cherry pick evidence that supports your claim and deny the evidence that doesnt.
Correlation vs. Causation:Assuming something is because of something else just because they happen to correlate.
For more examples, check out Tyler VigensSpurious Correlationsto see how absurd these types of arguments can be.
Straw Man:Making up a scenario to make the opponent look bad.
Youre assuming because they think one thing they must think another.
For example, if they dont like orange juice, they must think oranges are bad for people.
Omniscience:Using statements that imply all of something or every thing are a certain way.
For example, saying something like all dogs pee on fire hydrants.
This would require you to be omniscient to make such claims, which is not possible.
Dont leave finding information to be a reactionary step.
Talk to others who can provide accurate information.
Talk to others who disagree with you, but are willing to see your perspective.
Ditch the bad evidence youve been holding on to.
Listen to what they have to say and take it in.
Furthermore, your opponent may come to your side without your having to do anything other than listen.
By letting your opponent speak, you may allow the situation to naturally resolve itself.
Rein in the emotions first.
Step away for a moment and let yourself cool down before you come back to the argument.
You also give them a chance to make mistakes and possibly realize theyre in the wrong.
This is an important step to winning.
This can disarm them and make it easier for you to persuade them later on.
You get to listen to what they say and look for weaknesses in their argument.
You give them a chance to mess up their argument.
Sometimes less is more.
The more you talk, the bigger the chance youll say something that can be used against you.
So let them talk first tosee if they can even support their own argument.
Thats when you swoop in.
Or you might get them to contradict themselves, strengthening your own argument.
Word your argument in the form of open-ended questions thatforce them to address your points.
Now they have to explain their position whether they like it or not.
If they refuse to answer, they lose the argument.
If they cant explain their position, they lose the argument.
If they do explain their stance, you could build on their explanation with more questions.
If you denounce every point of theirs, youll seem overly defensive and stubborn.
Remember, losing a battle doesnt mean losing the war.
You cant steamroll people into changing their minds because then theyll want to resist it.
Going off topicor succumbing tothe Red Herring fallacycan destroy your credibility, look defensive, and start new arguments.
Stay focused on the current subject and keep your emotions out of it.
If enough people agree to something it sort ofbecomes true in a social setting.
This can go both ways, though.
If they have the power of consensus behind them it can be tough to recover.
You should note, however, that its best to avoid the fallacies ofbandwagoningandappealing to authority.
Support is good, but you still want to keep your argument sound without them.
If you change what winning means to you, the possibilities are endless.
In the video above, philosopher Daniel H. Cohen suggests you stop looking at arguments as war.
Nobody wins in a war, and what little changes are made are usually due to submission.
Being right isnt that important most of the time, and its usually just to feed our own egos.
Logically, arguments are very rarely black and white.
If an argument gets too tense, diffuse it and youll both win in the long run.
There are always alternate conclusions to consider.
Remember the words of the greatSun Tzu:The greatest victory is that which requires no battle.
