This post originally appeared atThe Simple Dollar.

That can be a difficult transition.

Youhaveto think a little differently and the only way to do that is to cultivate a different mindset.

I’ve read mountains of books on self-improvement, personal finance, and psychology.

What Do You Want Most from Your Life?

Every single day, I spend at least a few minutes thinking about what I want from mylife.

By that, I don’t just mean the rest of the day or tomorrow or the weekend.

Those are big, weighty things and they can be hard to really think about.

So much of our future is shrouded in a mist of uncertainty.

What we can think about areprinciples.

This weekend might be a lot cooler or better if I bought this item or went on this trip.

Does a new dress for the party this weekend really matter very much?

What really matters is the relationships you build there and if those relationships don’t matter, why go?

How Do Your Daily Choices Work Toward That Life?

Still, I’m human.

Sometimes, they can seem unrelated.

How will my choices there affect those bigger life goals?

I’ll walk through a social interaction I had.

Did I actually cultivate a relationship there?

If not, why not?

I’ll walk through that upcoming trip to the store.

What kinds of foods should I buy for my long-term goals?

(Healthy ones, ideally at a low cost.)

Should I spend my money on incidental things?

Here’s what he has to say:

Consider, for example, shelter.

Here the list of choices may look like this:

1.

Sleeping under open air.

Sleeping under a tarp, bascha, or hootchie.

Living in a tent.

Living in a shack or a cabin.

Living in a ship cabin or a truck cab.

Living in a car or a boat.

Living in an RV.

Sharing a room with other people.

Having your own room.

Sharing an apartment with other people.

Having your own apartment.

Sharing a home with other people.

…

On this scale there is no demarcation of when a need becomes a want.

I live somewhere around level seventeen.The difference between the two is just the fulfillment of a lot of wants.

Now,I’m not advocating that people live in tents like hermits.That’s not the point.

I have a wonderful big house to live in that is shared only with people I dearly love.

Why would I want more?

I have a dresser full of well-fitting clothes that look reasonably good on me.

Why would I want more?

The same is probably true for books.

I eat amazing meals multiple times a day.

Why do I need to keep throwing money at more and moreand morewants?

Spend some time each day reflecting on all of the things that you have in your life that fulfillwants.

Make some lists like that list of housing options.

We want to “keep up” with them.

We want to feel good like they do.

We may even want to “beat” them in some fashion.

The end result of both of these things is an alteration of our own desires.

We suddenly desire something we didn’t desire before.

A very minor desire is suddenly amplified into a much bigger one.

A nonexistent desire can suddenly bubble intosomething you must have or must experience.

Then go further what about that item do younotwant?

Some attribute of the item?

The more you do this, the more you get in tune with whatyoupersonally want, separate from others.

This can be a rabbit hole of time, of course.

I usually break it up over several short sessions.

I’ll find some comparative reviews and read them during one session.

I’ll find some more during another one.

In between, I’ll think about what exactly I want from the item.

I want something I’ll actually use.

I want something that will actually last.

I want something that is going to provide an excellent experience for the price.

I even advocating researching small, regular purchases.

Taking this effort ensures that when you spend money on non-spontaneous stuff, you’re gettinggoodstuff at agoodprice.

This should be a completely natural thing, too.

It’s easy to get frustrated when the changes we want don’t happen incredibly quickly.

Financial independence uses a mindset that is almost entirely the opposite of that.

Financial independence is all about the long term.

It’s about patience.

It’s about taking your time.

There are countless specific practices you’re free to use to improve your patience.

Active listening is one.

Note-taking is another (and I’ll hit on that one again in a minute).

Forcing yourself to slow down is yet another one.

Different practices seem to work well for different people.

It takes longer, but it makes for a better conversation and a much deeper connection.

It takes longer, but the repair will last far longer and the bathroom will look better, too.

When you’re doing the dishes, take the time to load the dishwasher properly.

This practice is beneficial in several ways.

One, it teaches you something new about the world.

That in itself is a good thing.

No matter what you learn, you improve your understanding of the world around you.

Two, it gives you material to draw upon when you’re trying to understand other topics.

Our world is interconnected in so many ways.

you’re free to make sense of things much easier.

Three, it forces you tothink.

To understand a new idea requires you to use your mind in a powerful way.

Your mind is like a muscle in that the more you use it, the stronger it becomes.

It becomes much easier to learn other things if you’re familiar with the practice of learning.

Four, it can open up new avenues for earning money.

At the very least, it can help you keep the expense of specialists at bay.

Finally, it can open up new avenues of personal interest.

Areas that previously seemed dull can gradually be illuminated and become exciting to you as you learn.

This process enriches my life in many dimensions.

I’m much more willing to do things for myself.

I’m much more willing to explore the world around me.

I’m much more willing to try things outside of my comfort zone.

All of those things point in the direction of financial independence.

It doesn’t cost me a thing to check out a book from the library, either.

It leaves me wondering why I spend money on so many of the things that I do.

And that leaves me spending a lot less money.

And that leads, unsurprisingly, to achieving a lot of financial goals.

Do the people around you actively listen to you when you talk to them?

Do they spend their time trying to learn new things?

Are they careful about their purchases?

People like that already have most of the elements of a mindset of financial independence.

It’s present from their behavior.

The people you spend time with rub off on you.

Many of their habits and interests and quirks integrate themselves into your own life.

When you find people that are, make an extra effort to build a stronger relationship with those people.

Their behavior will rub off, too.

It’s not an on-and-off switch, either.

It’s a gradual process.

Instead, draw on these steps little by little throughout your life.

Bookmark this page (or save this email) and look at it regularly.

When it comes into your mind, try some of these practices.

Be patient with a purchase.

Learn something new today… and then again tomorrow.

Call up a friend who exhibits some good financial independence traits and invite them over for dinner.

Go for a walk in the woods and appreciate the beauty around you.

All of these steps build on themselves and reinforce each other, gradually changing how you see the world.