It’s frustrating when your friendor, worse, astranger on the internetis making ill-advised health decisions.
Maybe they smoke, or eat terribly, or buy everything Dr. Oz endorses.
Maybe they refuse to vaccinate their kids.
Here’s how to get through to them.
If somebody’s bad health decisions may affect you, you have every right to protect yourself.
But don’t confuse distance with help.
They say “What a jerk.
After all, one day they might decide they want help to quit their bad habits.
If it’s true, you’re playing a very long game.
Smoking has been vilified for decades, butmore than 17 percent of Americansstill smoke.
This really isn’t your best tactic.
Shame even backfires when the message isn’t directly aimed as an attack.
But here’s the thing: those messages already exist.
They’ve heard the message, and it didn’t work.
Unfortunately, this doesn’t work either.
It’s been called thedeficit modelbecause it assumes they just have some missing knowledge.
You fill the gap, they become enlightened, end of story.
But humans hold fast to cherished beliefs.
If you want to help friends or strangers, try focusing on benefits.
Meanwhile, don’t jump to conclusions about the person’s motivation.
An anti-vaxxer’s ultimate goal is the same as any other parent’s: the health of their child.
This is their lifestyle change and their challenge, not yours.
ask the person whether they want you to ask regularly how they’re doing.
Ask how they’re feeling not just whether they’ve stayed quit.
let the person know that it’s OK to talk to you whenever they need to hear encouraging words.
Even somebody who knows the facts and wants to change may not take the first steps right away.
Beating an addiction (or even a bad habit) is acomplicated and difficult task.
What’s more,willpower is a finite resource.
They spent their effort on other things in their life that needed attention more urgently.
They may just have to wait.
Persuading someone is hard, but it’s a skill it’s possible for you to learn.
