Heres what you’re gonna wanna know to help make your fantasies a reality.
Tell your partner, you know how we were talking about that fantasy of mine?
If necessary, you’re able to evensend them articlesorbooksto help them prepare.
Talking through exactly what you want to do to each other before you do it can be exceptionally erotic.
You may even find this part of the process to be more pleasurable than the actual event itself.
Theres also something to be said about taking ownership of your desires.
If its your fantasy, its your responsibility to take charge of the legwork behind it.
This comes up rather frequently when the fantasy involves wanting to be dominated.
but see to it youre clear that youre taking the lead.
This dynamic can also surface if you still feel a little shy about your fantasy.
If you want to have a threesome, watch threesome porn or find someone to flirt with over email.
Again, the anticipation is half the fun, so theres no need to rush into anything!
see to it to ask your partner, are you good with trying out that fantasy tonight?
But in the real world, acting out fantasies is messier.
Someones going to lose their erection, fall out of character, or get stuck in the handcuffs.
Each time you try, youre likely learn something new about enacting your fantasies.
Youll learn how to be more nimble with your sex toys.
Youll figure out the nuances of a good spanking.
Maybe youll even realize that your favorite part is talking it through and planning it out.
make a run at be patient, and have a sense of humor if things ever go awry.
Youll figure it out in time, and youll be so happy you did!
Vanessa Marin is a licensed psychotherapist (#78931) specializing in sex therapy.
Its her mission to take the intimidation out of sex therapy and bring the fun back into the bedroom.
Have questions about sex?
you’re able to reach her at[email protected], or at VMTherapy.com.
Title illustration by Tara Jacoby.
