You’re in good companymost people are in the same boat.
This post originally appeared onZen Habits.
It’s a search worth undergoing.
I’m going to give you a one-step method.
However, that one step is a doozy.
When someone tells you you look fat, this only hurts because you’re in your personal bubble.
It matters a lot, because in your bubble, what matters most is how everything affects you personally.
I’m the same way, and so is everyone else.
This is why we don’t exercise or why we don’t only eat healthy food.
This fear of being uncomfortable is also why we get anxious at the thought of meeting strangers.
It hampers our social lives and our love lives.
Because we don’t want to look bad, we are afraid of failing.
So we don’t tackle tough things.
We procrastinate because of this fear of failing and fear of discomfort.
But more on that in a minuteI ask for your patience here, because this is important.
There’s more than our little fears.
Including the pain and suffering of other people and compassion for them.
Compassion forall living beings.
Wanting to make the world better.
We become less self-centered and begin to have a wider view when we step out of our bubble.
How does this relate to finding our life purpose?
Let’s explore that.
We then work to make their lives better, and lessen their suffering.
It’s the intention that matters.
As we go about our daily work, we can tie our actions to this greater purpose.
This gives us motivation on a moment-to-moment basis.
What career you choose is not important in this regardwhat matters is the bigger purpose.
You’ll learn over time.
What matters is becoming bigger than yourself.
Once you do, you learn that you have a purpose in life.
First, you must see when you’re stuck in the bubble.
You are at the center of your universe, and everything is relating to you and your feelings.
Your momentary pleasure is what matters in this bubble.
Second, when you notice that you’re in the bubble, expand your mind and heart.
See the bigger picture.
Feel what others must be feeling.
attempt to understand rather than condemning.
See how little and petty your concerns and fears have been.
Realize that if others treat you badly, it’s not about you, but about their suffering.
Third, wish others well.
Genuinely want their happiness, just as you want your own happiness.
See their suffering and wish for it to end or lessen.
Fourth, see how you might help.
How can you lessen the suffering of others?
Sometimes it’s just by paying attention and simply listening.
Other times you just need to be there, just lend a hand.
You don’t need to go around solving everyone’s problems they probably don’t want that.
Just be there for them.
And see if you’re free to make people’s lives bettercreate something to make them smile.
Repeat this process multiple times a day, and you’ll get better at it.
You’ll learn to be bigger than yourself.
You’ll learn that there is nothing more fulfilling than making the lives of others a little better.
Read more about him:My Story.
Image adapted fromMyPortfolio(Shutterstock) andjesadaphorn(Shutterstock).
Photos byJustin Scott Campbell(Flickr),Lauren Hammond(Flickr), andTrekking Rinjani(Flickr).
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