Here are some tips for keeping your cool when your temper feels like a short fuse burning.
What can differ, however, is what you do after you hit the brakes.
Think about the situation:Ask yourself a question to help you assess the situation.
Is it something you’re free to control?
Did you misunderstand the thing thats fueling your fire?
Know where youre going before you move forward.
Take a time out:Excuse yourself andstep away from the situation.
Youre a pot of boiling water, so remove yourself from the heat source before you boil over.
Take a couple of deep breaths:Slow your heart rate and send oxygen to your brain.
Repeat until you feel calm enough to react.
Think of it as your talisman and reach for it when your impatience starts to peak.
This will interrupt the impatience cycle and give you a chance to regroup.
Then when things get to be too much, do the pocket switcharoo.
For instance, if youre about to shout at your co-worker, imagine how you would look.
Is your face red?
Are you waving your arms around?
Would you want to work with someone like that?
You may care about whats frustrating you, but you probably care about what you look like too.
Especially if you happen to be in a professional environment.
Get in touch with the feeling or emotion first.
Once youve done that, make a silent declaration to yourself that you dont want it anymore!
Acknowledge what youre feeling and disown it.
Replace it with thoughts that are constructive.
Declare that you want to be productive and calm instead.
Your thoughts will drift from anger to things that make your job more manageable.
If meditation isnt your thing, a little exercise can be just as good.
Youll feel healthier, sleep better, andbe happier.
Yelling, insulting, and even ignoring them will probably only make the problem worse.
Dont do it when youre upset, though.
A warning is a simple way to express how you feel and get it out of your system.
Still seething after someone cut you off on the way to work?
Use your anger as fuel to get a mountain of work done.
Kids driving you nuts?
Get them out of your hair for a bit and clean the whole house.
Volunteer for the grunt work and burn off some of that pent up rage.
Whatever the task, youll feel better and get tons of work done.
Sometimes work is the best distraction of all.
Feel free to explain other things that might have contributed to your outburst as well.
Maybe youve been more tired than usual, or maybe youve just been more stressed than usual.
Let people know and they might be able to empathize with you more.
In a moment when youre not upset, think about what seems to grind your gears the most.
Is it a person?
Is it a specific task thats part of your job?
Is it your environment?
When you know what it is, talk to someone that can help.
If its a certain task, you might be able to finagle someone else into doing it.
It never hurts to complain a little as long as youdo it the right way.
Dont overdo it, of course, but youll never know until you try.
Gail Brenner at the Change Blog suggests youprepare for how you deal with those situationsbefore they happen again.
If you know youll keep riding into battles, stop going in unarmed.
Think about what you could do to give yourself some armor.
Deal with people that bug you as quickly as you’re free to.
