Were happiest on Saturdays at 7:26pmat least thats whatthis surveyfound.
So how can we make the rest of our week that happy?
This post originally appeared on theCrew blog.
It seems that Weekend Happiness is something we all tend to feel regardless of whats happening in our lives.
All this made me ask:
Why does a Saturday feel different than a Wednesday?
Heresa summary of my resultsif you want all the details.
In fact, my average daily rating was a 6.6/10.
Slightly better than average.
I was fortunate to be born into a stable, loving family that encouraged me to learn.
I paid off my student debt and married my dream girl.
This is the life I wanted and have been working towards.
So shouldnt I be rating every day a 10?
I knew there was some cause that kept pulling my daily satisfaction lower.
And looking at my own numbers, that something seemed to be happening during the weekdays.
On the 2 days where I experienced 4/5 major happiness factors I rated those days 8/10.
The more happy moments per day, the better.
But what about stressors?
daily rating when I thought I did enough work: 7.6/10
Avg.
It was obvious that the pressure to get enough work done was a key driver of stress for me.
Especially during the week.
I reserve mornings for quiet, focused work.
While my wife prefers to catch up on calls and check emails.
Because shes also my co-founder, many things she sees in her email relate to me.
We evolved to recognize when someone is stressed because it was an advantage to survival.
Mirror neurons in your brain will fire whether you like it or not.
The more people around you are stressed, the more the feeling multiplies.
If youve been in heavy traffic youve experienced the web link effect of stress.
Theres honking and people cutting each other off or yelling in their cars.
Compounding secondhand stress is one of the main reasons we feel more stress during the week.
Everyone has their own list of things to get done.
And the more people you work with, the more lists youre likely on.
During the week, theres more emails, more meetings, and more expectations.
Things spiral out of control.
When the world around you feels stressed or dissatisfied, these feelings easily rub off on you.
The researchers paged the participants at different times and asked them to share how they were feeling.
Connectedness:The opportunity to spend time with people they are closest with.
(It was my third biggest source of happiness).
This might explain why evenunemployed people tend to feel happier on weekends.
I also learned more about the impact other people can have on my feelings of happiness and stress.
I realize Im not going to feel happy all the time.
Feeling sad, stressed, or angry is part of experiencing life.
What I want is to improve my general outlook toward each day.
When something happens, we choose how to react.
While a little stress once-in-a-while wont kill you, constant stress will.
The road is long and a cloud hanging over you all the time is not healthy.
Youll never feel like youve done enough.
Your work wont be as sharp.
Eventually, youll run out of gas.
He conserves his energy.
He prepares his mind for the long haul.
After I did this experiment, I wanted to find ways to operate for the long haul.
Heres what has worked for me:
1.
The source of my stress boiled down to something that seemed so innocent: my to-do list.
It had become unwieldy.
Looking back, it seems ridiculous that at one point I had 161 tasks to do on one day.
This sort of storing of ideas makes it impossible to feel like youre making any progress.
Ive written aboutthe stress from my to-do listbefore.
Its been a long, hard journey to discovering what works.
A shorter list alone doesnt solve the problem.
Once I had this list, I put these tasks in the project management toolTrello.
Under each column, I put the current project Im working on.
This blog post for instance, would go under Writing.
I put in enough tasks that will take about 5-6 hours to complete.
This leaves enough time for other unexpected tasks that might come up, as well as breaks.
I just need to fill in the blanks.
Another challenge Ive always had with my to-do list is things never getting crossed off.
Because my list never changed, I didnt see progress.
Overestimate Your Deadlines
Over the last year I tracked my personal deadlines.
I only hit about a quarter of them.
Like most people, I always think I can do more.
But when I miss a deadline, it becomes a source of stress.
Instead, I give myself a target of just writing each day.
It could be a paragraph or a full article.
As long as I write something, I win.
If you overwork yourself today and dont do your work tomorrow, whats the outcome?
Less repeatable progress and more stress.
Of course if youre in a zone, dont stop.
Write 50,000 words if youre feeling it.
But if your attention starts to fade (i.e.
Things always take longer.
If you get something done early, youll feel like you have extra time.
And when was last time you felt like you had extra time?
Do as much as you might today so that you want to do it again tomorrow.
Do Focused WorkBut Before You Do, Tell the People You Work With
Not all hours are created equal.
Just because you work more hours, doesnt mean youre doing more (or better) work.
Multitasking is a myth.
When I first started working with no interruptions it felt awkward.
Because I was thinking about my rudeness, my mind wasnt fully focused on my work.
Not everyone works this way so if I choose to, I need to tell the people around me.
Heres an example of a message I send my wife before I start work.
This would almost always lead to an argumentanother source of stress.
Both of these only lead to more stress for everyone.
I used to lay in bed and try everything I could to force myself to sleep.
As I lay awake longer and longer, I could feel my stress build.
So, instead of lying in bed awake when I cant sleep, I tried something new.
If Im restless, I wake up and work on whats on my mind.
It doesnt matter if its 2am, 3am, or 4am.
But if you cant, wake up and work on whats bugging you.
National Geographic researcher Dan Buettnerstudied areas of the world where people are living the longest.
Staying in any one position for too long causes our blood circulation to drop.
Moving gives you a moment to refresh.
Its an opportunity to refresh your brain and make you feel good.
In between your work, move.
Lie on the floor.
Switch the table youre working at.
Go for a walk.
Food is your fuel.
To feel good, youve got to get this right.
Give Five Minutes Toward Daily Affirmations
Im fortunate, but I dont think about how fortunate I am enough.
I am (i.e.
creative, a happy person)…
To end the day:
Three amazing things that happened today.
How could I have made today better?
At first, I didnt think taking the time to write what Im grateful for would be much help.
I thought it wouldnt be much different than just thinking about what Im grateful for more often.
But after doing this for a few days, Ive noticed Im often more positive throughout the day.
And while looking forward is necessary for progress, sometimes we need to pause and look around.
Were missing out if were just cycling through a stressful five days and recovering for two.
If the first things you try dont work, hit it one more time.
When writer Steven Pressfield struggled with criticism, his friend Tony Keppelmantold him:
…be happy.
Youre where you wanted to be, arent you?
So youre taking a few blows.
Thats the price for being in the arena and not on the sidelines.
Stop complaining and be grateful.
Part of playing in the game is getting knocked down.
Find him on Twitter@mikaelcho.
Top image byStickerama(Shutterstock).
